In the business of theology it is hard not to be controversial - Jurgen Moltmann

Monday, 7 January 2008

峭壁疑惑 :: ponder on the steep

From my limited experience of climbing high mountains, I've learnt that the several thousand metres below my feet is no guarantee that I can reach the summit. The same is true for PhD studies. I might have already accomplished almost everything, but almost is still almost —— it is not yet everything.

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有人見我說攀爬論文峭壁接近尾聲,連聲道賀兼打氣兼鼓勵。感激。

叩謝之餘,也不得不稍為澄清一下,以免造成不必要的期望,和將來的失望。

我攀山經驗絕不豐富,但也算有,怎也跟過文策表哥上東南亞第一高峰 ——沙巴的神山 (Mount Kinabalu)。那次的經驗,叫我和隊友親身體會到大量中文成語的涵義 —— 舉步維艱,步步為營,一山還有一山高,一失足成千古恨 ... 。原來漢文化裡面這麼多對人生景況的論述,是和山有關的。

攀那種真正的高峰,跟上香港的太平山獅子山大帽山鳳凰山大不同,是愈接近頂峰愈艱苦愈難上的,就算已經登了98%,也不敢確定自己一定可以安全到達,更加舉步維艱,更加步步為營,雖有無限風光在險峰,也知一失足成千古恨,而且週遭條件更嚴峻。

攀這博士的險峰,我就想起從前就讀的神學院裡面兩位華裔學兄,都是當年學院裡GPA 4.0的頂級高手。畢業後一位在哈佛磨了沒有十年也有八年了吧,完成了ThD總算穩步上揚,如今任教美國南部某著名學府,又活躍於華裔聖經研究界;另一位到了阿伯丁(鴨巴甸),苦修八年,結果MPhil而回。

回想當年看著文策表哥在距離神山頂峰不過幾百公尺處,無法突破,望峰而知天命,我就領略到,腳下踏過的那幾千公尺,根本不是成功到頂的保證。

此刻,如聖保羅所言,我是攻克己身,叫身服我,恐怕我傳 [讀神學博士的] 福音給別人,自己反被棄絕了。

5 comments:

Wales said...

Yes, it's not easy to get through the road of "PhD". As I've gone through the same path as you're now facing, though mine is PhD in Engineering, you can think in this way: you're not alone in the road. You have your tutor, collegues, roommates and God, of course.

Never give up and you can reach the summit one day.

Dr. Yeung

Yam 飲者 said...

Dr Yeung, thanks for coming by and for being so warmly encouraging. You are the first person whom I've come across (including myself) over the last 4+ years to make that statement of being 'not alone'. Perhaps it's a matter of difference in field, or maybe we have different kinds of 'loneliness' in mind...
Many thanks, anyway.

Carmen said...

行行吓,咦,就到咗山頂囉!

Yam 飲者 said...

吓? 你呀,卡雯? 好野啊! 果然係中國重點大學客座教授呀吓!

Benjamin Wu said...

分享我最喜愛的聖經節之一:

「我深信那在你們心裏動了善工的,必成全這工,直到耶穌基督的日子。」(腓一6)